I can’t admit I like chubby girls

If you wanted me to write on the second-most embarrassing subject I could think of, I’d write about the fact that I like chubby girls.

To be more accurate, I find a range of female body types attractive: from fit to chubby. I do not like skinny girls—and by “skinny” I do not mean normal, which is what most girls refer to as “skinny.” I mean girls who are actually underweight. Most runway models are too thin to interest me sexually.

Something that girls don’t understand: to the same extent there is pressure on women to look a certain way, there is pressure on men to only like girls who look a certain way. There’s a special shame reserved for those of us who find something attractive that we’re not supposed to. It’s humiliating. It makes you feel flawed as a man.

I’d like to think that if I were gay I’d have no problem coming out of the closet, but considering how hard it is for me to even admit that I like thick women it seems more likely I’d be barricaded. Or maybe not. It’s more acceptable to judge a man for liking fat girls than it is to judge him for liking men.

There's actually not that much difference between these girls, but it was the best comparison I could find. And the girl on the right is smoking hot.

Consider the women above. The two on the left are thin, fit. I am attracted to them, but if they were skinner they’d be too thin.

But now consider the girl on the right. Look at those contours! Look where her estrogen is telling her body to store fat! Look how much more shapely her legs are, how irresistibly cute the curve of her belly, how much more pronounced her hips and female form! Her body stands out and draws attention in a way the other two don’t. It’s bold. It says, I am FEMALE. I’m a WOMAN.

And the girl on the right is really just healthy and normal. She’s not even chubby.

Imagine we had three girls: one who was model-skinny, one who was average, and one in the average-to-chubby area. If forced to choose the most attractive woman in private, there’s no doubt in my mind most men would select the average or heavier girl. But if they had to choose in front of a group of other men, they’d feel the artificial social pressure kick in and they’d choose the average or skinny girl.

More than once I have liked a chubby girl—and done nothing about it because of the judgment I’d incur if I actually did something. “Disgusting, he likes fat chicks.” Or, “She’s lucky he has low self-esteem, or he wouldn’t be with a fat chick like her.” I wouldn’t even have to hear it; I’d just know this talk was going on behind my back. What makes this worse is that I know these girls could at least have gotten an ego boost from turning me down. And maybe they even would have liked me.

More than once, girls I’ve known who weren’t overweight have taken extensive measures to get skinny. It was too difficult for me to tell them that I thought they were much more beautiful before they lost the weight. What is really tragic is that they’d probably think I was making the token “You didn’t have to lose any weight” compliment; they wouldn’t realize it was really true.

The only conclusion I can come to is: I care too much what other people think.

The pictures below illustrate more of what I’m talking about. These are women I’d consider attractive, the last one being on the heavy end of the spectrum.

What post about beautiful full-figured women is complete without a picture of Nigella?

This is a great illustration of how much difference it makes how a girl's body distributes fat.

Advertisements
29 comments
  1. I LOVE chubby women! But, like you, I’m a hypocrite and hate extra fat on my body.

    Sad, dude.

  2. My husband is always trying to convince me that most men like meat. I guess it took this article to believe him!

    • Anonymous said:

      most men dont like meat, this article is bullshit

      • Anonymous said:

        A lot of men do, you fuckwit

    • Thanks! Gave you a comment + pingback. I look forward to the day that thicker girls will have confidence to go with their beauty.

  3. It does make me uncomfortable when people say that the woman on the far right screams “I am a woman” because of her curves. It’s as if the other two aren’t “real” women when they are. Just my opinion, though.

  4. I wish more guys would come out (as it were) and admit things like this! I battled with an eating disorder all through my teens, and the one thing that finally helped me get over it was when I met the man who is now my husband and he made it quite clear that he thought I was perfect just the way I was (and am) – boobs, hips and all. I’m quite sure that a lot of men do feel the same way as you – if there was more honesty about it then the world would be filled with many more happy women.

    • I’m glad you got over your eating disorder, and that you believed your husband’s words—too many women deflect compliments on aspects of themselves they’ve learned to hate. The only thing sexier than a curvy girl is a curvy, confident girl.

  5. Bravo. Says a lot of about us as a species. What is it with this obsessing about appearance and fitting in? I would love to know what it is in our brains that puts us through such contortions. Thanks for the post.

  6. Congratulations for writing and sharing this post! I’m sorry I’m late to the party, the “Beauty of a Woman” Blogfest party. But I’m still working on making the rounds and reading every single one of them. This was a don’t miss! Thank you! :)

  7. Greg said:

    This was incredibly comforting for me. I admit that I care way too much about what other people think of me, but I can’t help it. I know that women feel pressured into being thin, but I also feel kind of pressured by society that liking chubby girls is wrong. It really makes me feel better and even more confident that other people also like bigger women. Seriously, thank you for writing this!

  8. sara herrera said:

    i love this article and finally someone spoke out i have a lot of pressure from my family telling me to loose weight because i am too fat but actually i feel like i am just right and that i can knock some men out of their socks i am confident that i am beautiful besides what matters is how the person is from the inside not meaning their guts Lol >.<

  9. oh and guys what matters the most you being happy or that ure so called friends judge you’re licking for women i say big is better >.< but too big is just unhealthy

  10. It is me said:

    I am a chubby girl and I consider you nothing more than a whiner. I’ve observed those patterns of behaviour a thousands of time… guys who think they were special for liking chubby and who want to deem themselves martyrs because of their preference. Obviously being a chubby chaser is a way for a lot of guys to isolate themselves from “society” which in their eyes is homogeneous and below their level and to feel elevated from those they think were victims of mainstream.
    A real bbw lover knows it is normal to like chubby women and he doesnt make a fuss about it. Start being a man and stop whining!

    • I could see how I came across as whiny. All I can say is that it’s a blog post, so you’ll have to expect a higher degree of that than you’d see in everyday life. The internet is where people come to bitch about the things they suck up and deal with in real life. It’s nice to take a break from that every now and then and let it out, I guess.

  11. Myself said:

    I’m a bit late in responding but let me add my 2 cents. So you’re ashamed of admitting you like chubby girls, that’s a bit hypocritical of you. We should always be true to ourselves. Liking a chubby girl is nothing to be ashamed of, on the contrary, many chubby girls, even big ones, are a lot more beautiful than the twigs, but that’s just my own personal opinion :) I’m not trying to be critical of you, you seem very sweet and there are lots of guys who think like you and are in your situation, but there are many others who also like chubby girls and actually LIKE to admit it.You’ll be much happier as soon as you realize that what people think doesn’t mean sh*t. Do what makes you happy and don’t worry about others. It takes confidence but many times that comes with age. Look at Pierce Brosnan, almost 60 years old but looks incredible for his age, a sexy and charming man and is happily married to Keely who is now plus sized. He obviously doesn’t seem to mind because something is making her wear those bikinis on the beach :)

  12. P said:

    There sould be more men like you outhere, so don’t be afraid to swo your taste openly, because women will love you! If you are good to others you will receve kindness from them!

  13. Heather said:

    Thank u for writing this. Me being a proud, happy, I suppose “attractive” chubby girl knows many guys who hide the fact that they’re attracted to me. It takes special guys to admit it and not care what others think :)

  14. Rosehips said:

    I’m chubby and super confident about it. I love and adore my curves. I lost weight once and got down to a size 5 and felt yucky. I rock a 9/11 like no ones business. I hope you’ve grown a sack and at some point stop giving a fuck what other people think. It’s insane to me that you would rather miss out on some hot tang (and a possible LTR) than have some cunt douchebag label you a chubby chaser. You are what you are pal, and it won’t change, so why not say fuck it and start enjoying life?

  15. Nicole said:

    It’s not until some men are old and already married to thin socially acceptable thin women that they are looking at me and women like me longingly. It’s almost like I can hear them saying, “Why wasn’t I brave enough…?” It’s almost sad. It’s usually white men.
    Be brave men or you will regret it later. (I’m about 20lbs bigger than the girl on the right top pic. Smaller up top)

  16. Anonymous said:

    Hey I’m thin like the girl on the far right so you’re saying that most men don’t find my type of body attractive ?

    • Anonymous said:

      honestly -I had no idea there was so much presure on men too. I never came to think of that presure can come upon both sides, women and men… It makes me sad that women are so bussy with being obsessed with their own apearences that they/we can’t even see that maybe the other side has some problems with social/physical standars too… men are being far too excluded.

    • Anonymous said:

      You shouldn’t be makeing this about you, the man was makeing a point for something he enjoys and stand for. If saying something is good/better -it doesnt make the other thing bad.

  17. Anonymous said:

    Anon.man I love full figured women,always have.they do get me sprung,been married twice and both yummy bbws! Be confident women their a lot of guys like me out there

Give him a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: